Making Good Decisions
Aug 7, 2008
Last night we discussed the place of emotions in our decision, epically the emotion of fear. Everyone who was here could think of a time when fear made their decision instead of reason. We all agreed, after a good deal of conversation that decisions which are based on reason are preferred to decisions based on emotion.
We talked about what it is like when we feel a really strong emotion (something like: I really want it) and then we make up reasons to fit our emotions. We talked about easily we can do this without even realizing that is what we are doing. We have reasons but they follow our emotions like cars on a trail follow the engine. We talked about how we allow our engine which drives our decision could be reason and not emotion.
As we talked we were able to come up with a number of very specific examples where it is really hard to tell where emotion stops and reason begin. When making any decision it is really hard to see what is going on. And, the more we want something the harder it is to ďseeĒ the truth and good reason.
Several weeks ago Debbie and I became aware of a dog that was looking for a home. It is just the dog I want. A German shepherd mix, a year and half old, house broken, knows some obedience. It isnít a puppy; but it is still young enough to learn. The dog isnít huge, but is big enough that it would not be mistaken for some kind of rodent. I WANT this dog so badly. Debbie isnít opposed to the idea (I love her for that). But when I get honest with myself, it isnít a good time for such a dog. Right now Debbie and I are traveling more not less. We are so busy now that we have no time to train or play with a dog and it mostly likely would experience more neglect than love.
The truth hurts. The truth is I must let reason make the decision not my emotion. We wonít be getting the dog.
However, yesterday while Debbie was out an apple sales person came to the door. (You have to love Germany). She was from a farm not far from here and had grown the apples herself. I said no but she looked really sad and insisted I try a bite. I am such a sucker for these things. The apple tasted good. You had to buy 10 kilos and they were too expensive. My mind said to say no, but my emotions are looking at a sad face and my emotions made the decision.
It wasnít a good decision. I paid too much and now we have way too many apples. But Debbie did make two apple pies yesterday. (I love being married to Debbie. She is the best). And I will be able to keep the doctor away for the next 6 weeks. So, although it wasnít a good decision some good has come from it. SoÖmaybe there is some room for emotions in our decisions although I really donít believe it to be so.
While you're here,